And Now The End Is Here

 

And Now The End Is Here.

The titular “Wee Room” is a safe haven at the bottom of our garden where friends gather, music is played, books are read and ideas flow. It certainly saved my sanity during lockdown, it was a place I could go, watch the birds, be close to nature and to just be.

Over the last few months, I have been sharing my countdown to retirement. It has enabled me to get a few things off my chest, but also to take some much-needed space to reflect.

I have been so fortunate to have had a well-planned and very supportive transition. I have experienced some interesting and at times conflicting emotions. I have also noticed changes in me and those around me as my end date drew nearer. The expectations I place on myself and those from others have lessened. It has made me confront the frenetic pace of our sector and has led me to question and, indeed marvel at how we sustain ourselves in this line of work.

The last few weeks in particular have been very slow paced. That’s unusual for me and has been a very difficult adjustment. It has been hard to see my close colleagues and our frontline staff remain so mired in the stress of our sector. I have carried that stress for so long it has felt like part of me, it’s only now that I start to withdraw that I realise the permanent knot in my stomach is starting to loosen.

Leadership is challenging, it is often typified by a culture of busyness and overload that, for too many, becomes a constant state of being. It was for me, and it took coaching and a lot of introspection to shed the guilt of adopting a different work pattern in my final months. If you recognise yourself in this, all I can say is don’t wait till the countdown to retirement to attend to your own wellbeing. Now, more than ever, social care needs the dynamism, creativity, and innovation that the third sector brings. It’s hard to deliver that when you are knackered.

I have been deeply moved by the many messages of support I have had. I am very grateful for the recognition and acknowledgment of some of the highpoints of my career (thankfully the lowlights are for me to ponder alone). I have always worn my heart on my sleeve, and it comes naturally to me to give acknowledgement and praise, I believe that is an important aspect of leadership. It costs us nothing, but when given with sincerity it delivers so many rewards.

It is important to lift our heads and look about us and to call out the great things our teams do, in my experience its fuels people to deliver quality outcomes and to aim higher. Importantly, they remember it and the feeling of appreciation.

 I was so delighted that my final duties included being part of the launch of a Neuro Affirming Community of Practice for Scotland. The launch was a culmination of a lot of work from the fabulous National Autism Implementation Team, (NAIT). I am not an expert in communities of practice, but I am a big fan of them. I see this initiative as a real opportunity for Scotland. It will provide opportunities for knowledge creation, dissemination and so much more. This initiative is a chance for neurodivergent people to influence practice across a range of sectors. It’s a route to setting ethical standards of practice, to challenge harmful narratives and to insist on practice that enables people to life as their authentic selves. It is, of course, early days, but I implore practitioners to engage. Bring your knowledge and experience but be ready to take new knowledge and understanding away with you, challenge your assumptions and listen to those who are on the receiving end of your services.

An open heart and an open mind are among the key resources any practitioner needs to lead a fulfilling and impactful career. As my own full on, full time working life draws to a close, I am hopeful that autism practice in Scotland is in good hands.

The Wee Room is taking a wee break. I am going to rest, bake, walk and just be for a while. I will be back in the new year with a new look blog as well as sharing my plans for retirement light.

Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to send their good wishes. Your messages and memories have left me with a full heart and more than a little teary eyed. I’m looking forward to my next chapter and whatever that brings.